One cool thing about the IDkit is that it highlights DVD’s, organizations, and books that shed light on common issues queer teens encounter when growing up in faith based communities. This month we have a special guest interview from author Jallen Rix, EdD, author of Ex Gay No Way. Along with being an award nominated writer (Rix is among 5 Lambda award finalists in LGBT Nonfiction) Rix is also a sexologist and he has been open in an exclusive interview about teens, faith, and sexuality. Over the span of three posts we will read his unique and encouraging words on queer-Christian issues.
Sex, Taboo, and Growing Up
Q: Crystal Cheatham
A: Jallen Rix EdD
Part 2: On Success & Friendship
One of the things that challenge LGBTQ’s is the knowledge that state and governmental laws aren’t always on our side. It’s hard to be comfortable with your sexuality when you know that your school can suspend you for being queer, or that you can be fired or thrown out of a restaurant for the same reason.
Q: Do you have any words of wisdom about confronting this fear?
A: I know it’s been said before, but you are not alone, and your circumstance is not forever. If your environment is oppressive, let it be known to people who might be able to do something about it – perhaps your parents, but also other people you look up to. Further, I can promise that it won’t be long before you can move out of the environment you are in and begin a whole new life – one that you can fashion into exactly what you want it to be.
Q: From your book we know that your spirituality was tied into your musicality. Did you ever feel as though you wouldn’t succeed in life, in music, and at a career because of your orientation? (if yes how did you overcome those feelings of despair?)
A: Sure, I was afraid that the most authentic, unique parts of me would be the very parts that would cause my demise, and that people would reject. Yet, I found the exact opposite was true. Those characteristics that seem uniquely me, are the very same features I can make shine the best, and people are often most attracted to those aspects. Further, I surrounded myself with people that would accept me for who I am – as unconditionally as possible. I also had to go and find those people. I didn’t just sit at home and whimper “Why won’t anybody be my friend.” No! I went out there and made myself the best friend I could possibly be. It’s work, I know, but it’s how you build a family of your own.
*Thanks for reading! Stop by in a week for more of this exclusive interview with Jallen Rix EdD. Next up we will be discussing his thoughts on the Church and LGBTQ members.
-The Team of Your IDk